It’s “I Need Therapy” Thursday

I’m busy chopping up pieces of paper and trying to assemble something like a coherent story, or a set of notecards, or at least some coasters from it, and in the mean time, I am SUCKING like a suckling pig sucks on an apple, or maybe more like a sucking chest wound.

Between teaching myself HTML (WTF??) and trying to figure out how to make my boobs look 20 again, I’m too distracted to give you anything good.

So I’m giving y’all a break and losing my audience and probably ditching my fabulous career so I can catch up on everything I’ve been ignoring, like washing my hair and folding laundry and organizing my toothpick holder collection.  My little ones are buried in the clothes and I’d really like to see them again before they turn into surly teenagers (and in case you’re wondering, the “little ones” are not the boobs).

This time I swear I’m really doing it.  I can quit posting junk any time!  I’m not a junkie!  Watch me kick, I can do it.  Oohhh, the spiders! They’re crawling under my skin aaaaaaaarrrrghhhhhhh.

Besides, my self-esteem has packed its bags and moved to Alaska to be with Sarah Palin (whose boobs don’t need my help).  I’m thinking being next to her might make me look like a good mother, and since my body will be elsewhere I won’t have to worry about any physical comparisons.

As for my body, it will be hitting the road, too, but in a different direction, maybe to trade school.

I might be better suited for a life of physical labor.

I’m thinking lumberjack.

Me in my minivan, with the stupic puffy hair the haircutting lady gave me, ready for a Fear and Loathing experience. Without the hallucinogenics.  Boo.

Me in my minivan, with the stupid puffy hair the haircutting lady gave me, ready for a Fear and Loathing experience. Without the hallucinogenics. Boo.

So so long, and thanks for all the fish.  And the M&Ms.  And the wampeters, foma and granfalloons.  They were good, too.

I’ll be back next week with my super hero persona back and intact.  If I can find all the necessary pieces.


13 Responses to “It’s “I Need Therapy” Thursday”

  1. See you in an hour or two.

    For the record: I think your hair looks adorable.

    Good luck with “Project Boobs”.

  2. You look so fresh and young! Wait – that sounds like I’m describing little tomatoes, which by the way are the same size as MY boobs. See ya next week!

  3. You look great BK, hurry back.

  4. Me again. Sorry. But I felt you’d want to know… I asked Bob Trusty, and he told me…

    LOSTL is Laugh Out Side Then Loudly

  5. I love the hair!

    • Thank you! But I’m usually more of the tousled, spiky sort. I like that “I just rolled out of bed” look. Or maybe I just say I like it since that’s how I always look.
      Thanks for stopping in again. Hope the quitting thing is going well. 🙂

      • I still smell good. No smoke fumes stinkng up my clothes or clinging to my hair. I’m on Chantix, so that means I get these really good dreams. They’re all either sex or falling off the tobacco truck and starting to smoke again. But when I wake up, neither dream is true!

        My hair does what it wants to. I gave up trying to control it. My hair says “I own this woman,” and then I hear this evil hairy laugh.

        • I’d like some Chantix. I have evil dreams. Evil dreams of world media domination. Just ask Alantru. And if I could dream about smoking again with none of the bad effects – well. My world would be a happier place. Unless you wake up from the smoking dreams with worse cravings. That would be bad.

          Hair, schmair. I shaved my head last summer and it was fabulous. But I don’t have Sinead O’Connor’s face to offset the bare head, so I had to grow it out.

  6. I think the gamine look really suits you. And don’t knock the toothpick collection…..

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